Meeting Other Moms That Don’t Know About My Pain Condition
Meeting Other Moms That Don’t Know About My Pain Condition – Recently my youngest has joined a volleyball club, which means new people, especially new moms. I always enjoyed meeting new people, ones that don’t know my story just to give me some time when someone is not asking me how I feel or how I am doing. Don’t get me wrong, I truly appreciate that people care, but sometimes I just miss being a person, the mom. Meeting new people gives me the brief time of acting as “normal” as possible, not showing my pain so that they don’t feel sorry for me or my family. Because lets face it, I don’t want to be that mom with some disease they never heard of. Why? I guess I just want a break from some stranger telling me that their cousins-friends-sister had this and did the certain treatment and now they are fine.
As our almost all day tournament transformed. I found myself in the middle of a mom group, which was fine, they were very nice and open. I thought whew, I lucked out. I only took my medications when I went to the bathroom so they didn’t have a clue. I brought my own chair so the bleachers were not an issue, all in all I was pretty comfortable.
As the day went on they became more open and talkative. I started to hold my breath just waiting for the dreaded question of “What do you do for a living?”. I could tell them I volunteer with an online chronic pain site and group, but I know immediately that will bring up that I have chronic pain. I could tell them I’m a stay at home mom, which I have done before, but I was surprised…. it didn’t come up, at least not this time.
As they devoured into the conversation, I found myself just listening to the mom problems I may have had if I wasn’t sick. The first topic came up was what they feed their kids and what they are and are not allowed to eat. My kids are lucky if I can cook on most days, but are still happy and athletic.
Second was how they will not allow their children to have study hall in high school, “No way would my kids be allowed to just sit for an hour doing nothing, they will be putting them in an extra strength class”. I was pretty shocked about this one and then I remembered that they said these were their oldest children. See I have two children done with high school and I will tell you, study hall was a life saver during sports seasons! They could get all their homework done and then move on to sports after school and not be up until 11pm doing homework after a game. My children have grown up knowing academics will always come before sports, not the other way around. My sickness has shown me how important our minds are even though our bodies can fail us.
The third major conversation was how many times they work out and what classes the moms take, I thought oh boy here we go. Umm I do not work out..there is no way my pain would let me do half of what these moms are talking about. I am lucky if I can get in a short walk or some low impact exercises.
I was shocked with how much these women have on their plate. They work full-time and have time to worry about all these things. I guess my sickness has taught me a thing or two in the mom world. The major thing is has taught me is to slow down and stop stressing over the little things. Not to take life for granted. Enjoy my kids at every stage. And to love the life I am in, regardless of my pain condition.